also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
