I think i sorta joined a cult last night
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
