so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
