Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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