Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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