I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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