I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
