he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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