I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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