Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
