i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
