I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
