it was like eating out sand paper
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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