she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i dont even know how to be here
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize