omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
i out mim tonsoeep
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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