we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
