But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
