a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
