Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
