Christians are straight up FREAKS
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
