No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
