Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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