come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
this will be a night to untag.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
