I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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