I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
