i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Drunk is not a location!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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