is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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