nut hugger
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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