like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize