My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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