no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
