the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
