She's JV to your varsity
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
