My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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