North Korea, Best Korea!
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
