I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
operation have a gay friend backfired
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
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