I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
