I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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