Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
