Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Randomize
