I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
