I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
