Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
