Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
