That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
The air taste purple.
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