He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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