My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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