Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
My pussy is not your playground.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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