i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
