My first STD was from a foam party
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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